Goodbye Grandma S

Grandma died August 9th, 2017.

I want to put down my thoughts, but I feel that I'll do a poor job. I'm going to try anyways.

From June to August Grandma changed quite a bit. All five of us visited her on the 2nd. She didn't look the same, she was hardly there physically and could barely speak. But she would smile, and make faces at the kids and wink. She let Lucy play with her hands. Isaac was asleep for most of our visit, but when we asked if Grandma's boys turned everything into a weapon when they were little she made a exaggerated face and said "Oh no! Are you crazy?!?". She said that her kids never did that. She wanted our kids close to her.

That was how Grandma was at the end. In pain, drifting in and out of sleep, but still wanted to play with the kids and have them show her their toys.

Grandma was always interested in kids but I never truly noticed until I had some of my own. She would play games or wink at them over some shared secret. When she needed the help of a walker, she would insist on giving the kids a ride to their glee and my worry. This was always a highlight of their visit with Great Grandma.

Alice was always willing to accept a ride

Two kids, miraculously not fighting

I have spent many an hour playing hands of Skip-Bo with Grandma. She would bring our her fitted custom-made felt table cloth to cover the glass table. I assume that she would do this so we wouldn't notice when she was hiding cards in her lap.

If you would purposely do something that would block her next turn, she might lightheartedly say "Back of me hand to you!" or shake her head and say "Born to aggravate. Born to aggravate people!". After a while it motivated me to make moves that would get that reaction, so I guess Grandma was right.

Grandma and Lucy

Grandma always seemed to keep herself busy, especially after that shitty week in 1989 where she lost both her husband and father. After that for years, she would usually buy a big ticket item around that time. Sometimes a washer / dryer, sometimes a ring. Just something to distract herself. She took up all these different crafts. Painting on canvas. Silk painting - she made beautiful scarves. Cutting pictures in layers to generate depth. Macrame of lawn chairs. She did beautiful work on whatever she did. She probably learned a dozen other types of crafts that I don't even recall.

For family gatherings there would often be special foods. Homemade pickled beets. Trifle. Shortbread in white and pastel pinks and greens in little rectangles and circles. Little mincemeat tarts, usually served warm.

At Christmas time things would be tastefully decorated. She would have this little green porcelain or ceramic tree with these little plastic "lights" in it that reflected the light from a bulb inside. After Christmas everything would be packed up and put away for a year.

Growing up, when visiting Grandma's house everything would be perfectly clear and orderly. Even the basement. She'd offer us pop - pepsi in this case in funny little cans they had in the 80's. We'd play a homemade nail and ball bearing game that was like pinball but without the paddles. It really is a wonderful game that someone built. I'm not sure if it was my grandfather or great-grandfather.

Me, my brothers,  2 cousins, and our grandparents in 1984

Goodbye Grandma. I'll miss you.