This is how I will remember Grandma

The funeral for my grandma went well. My family handled it as they do all sad things - with a mix of laughter and tears. It's a really nice feeling when you see how my family backs each other up and sort of "moves as one" through the grief. Below is the speech that my cousin and I did.

[My part]
We were trying to decide how best to honour Grandma and we thought we would put together a few of our favourite memories as a tribute to her. This is how we will remember our Grandma.

One of the first things to know about Grandma is that she was a world traveler, and very proud of this. She would often remind us that she had been in 73 countries and 6 continents. She was only 400km away from seeing the elusive seventh continent, Antarctica, when she cruised around the horn of South America. While growing up, the grandkids acquired an impressive collection of souvenir t-shirts and gifts from exotic places. In fact, when Grandma and Grandpa would travel, they needed to bring an empty bag so that they would have room to pack up all of the gifts that they purchased for everyone. When they returned from an adventure, there would be a slide show with detailed explanations and stories. Some of those pictures, like the ones from the horn of South America, evoke interesting images. I can picture Grandma standing out on deck, in the freezing cold and during rough seas to get the best shots. All the while, the other passengers would be cozy and warm indoors, sipping their tea and gravol. She took great joy in exploring new places and seeing the world. That is how I will remember Grandma.

Grandma and Grandpa had a passion for photography. One of Grandma's favourite shots is of a little Kenyan Maasai girl. That picture now hangs in each of the Phillips' girls' homes. In order to take this shot, Grandma apparently had to chase a little girl all around the village. I can see her now, with the camera swinging wildly around her neck as she shuffled after the small frightened child. Somewhere in Kenya there is now a woman who has a deep rooted fear of white giants and flashing lights. That is how I will remember Grandma.

When Grandma was not travelling, I am fairly sure that her favourite place to be was at the Phillip's family cottage. The cottage is a place full of childhood memories and memories of Grandma. A tree was planted when each grandchild was born. It was a regular tradition of Grandma's to lead us around the yard at the cottage and point out each of our trees. Sometimes a tree would not make it through a season, so replacements were planted. Fortunately, she never replaced any of the grandchildren. She was very devoted to her family. That is how I will remember Grandma.

Every meal at the cottage was always followed by dessert. Grandma had a sweet tooth, and could easily be caught in the act of stealing a brownie or a cookie. One of the ways to her heart was with chocolate cherries. These were among the many things that would spread a huge gleeful smile across her face. You can see her beaming back at you in any photo of her. She laughed loud and smiled big. That is how I will remember Grandma.

Grandma was always busy at the cottage, carefully watering her geraniums in the flower boxes on the cottage deck, preparing her famous Waldorf salad, supervising important tasks, and checking in on everyone. She would always want to make sure that everyone was comfortable. She would greet us each morning with "Did you sleep well? Were you warm enough? Did you have enough blankets?" As time went on and her memory faded, this greeting was repeated several times each morning. She genuinely wanted everyone to have a nice time during their visits to the cottage. That is how I will remember Grandma.

[Amanda's part]
The cottage was a place to relax and enjoy. There were many days where it was too cold, too rainy to go outside. So out came the cribbage board. Fifteen's and thirty-one, and learning how to peg. Grandma loved teaching us how to play cribbage, and then playing with us. The first time I beat grandma, was like a rite of passage. I still love playing cards, and sometimes have a hard time finding other people to play with me, but cribbage holds a special place in my heart; I own 3 different cribbage boards! Sitting down at the kitchen table at the cottage, with the cribbage board and a deck of cards between us. That is how I will remember Grandma.

She would enthusiastically recount her adventures as a "flying WOG" and the first time she was asked to fly. Grandma was not an easy person to scare, this pilot tried all her could, going as far as flipping his plane upside down. All grandma could say was "Let's do that again!" Laura recently had a similar experience, flying in a four-seater plane over Toronto, in which the pilot asked if she scared easily and then shut off the engine. Grandma and Laura share this sense of adventure, I call it crazy. That is how I will remember Grandma.

Grandma strongly valued education. She was very proud of her top marks during her training as a wireless operator for the Canadian Air Force during the Second World War As we grew up and started to choose a path in life, Grandma would very generously support us with money for tuition and graduation gifts. She would ask how school was going with great interest. The day I told grandma I was going to go for my Master's degree she was so happy. Grandma was always interested in how school was going, and tell me how proud she was, and encouraging me to continue my education. Well I officially finished my masterís degree on Monday. Thank you. Grandma had a hand in helping me continue my education. That is how I will remember Grandma.

Grandma's generosity also extended to charities. She volunteered her time for charities and fundraising that she felt were important. She was a volunteer at Centenary Hospital for many years, and was involved in many other charitable works, including heart pillows for Sunnybrook, canvassing for the Canadian Cancer Society. As time went by grandma participated less and donated more. She was very generous in pledging her family for our fundraising efforts. Over the years she has supported me and my sister in the Weekend to End Breast Cancer and the Relay for Life for the Canadian Cancer Society. Most recently she supported me in my fundraising efforts in honour of my son Nickolas with the Spina Bifida and Hydrocephalus Association of Ontario. Being generous and active in meaningful charities. That is how I will remember Grandma.

Grandma was very pleased to have a number of great grandchildren. There are seven in all, ranging in age from 6 months to almost 9. She was very content to sit with a young great grandchild in her lap, or chat with them about a drawing or a new toy. My last memory I have of Grandma is her sitting with Nickolas in her lap, just staring at each other. That is how I will remember Grandma, and how I wish my children would remember their great grandma.

There is so much more we can say about grandma. Her love of music which has made its way down to her great-granddaughter who loves music and playing on her grandmotherís piano. Her love of animals, and robin eggs that have their own front porch. Her encouragement for her family to travel, and helping however she could. There are so many ways to remember Grandma.